| | Today was not the best day ever, partially because of what happened in the morning, but towards the end it gradually got better. This winter break, things have been changing and I find myself opening up to a lot of new situations, unexpected experiences, and truly living life for what it is. I've always felt that everything happens for a reason and much of the time, we are lost in bewilderment as to why these things happen to us. I try to think on the positive side, but someone once told me that although you can see all the good and beauty in the world, you also get to see people at their darkest hours in order to bring them into the so-called "light". I choose to find a reason for my actions and explain to myself why it would happen to me. I have discovered that it helps me live with the consequences that occur and I'm still in a learning process of truly understanding who I am as an individual and where I'm going. There is so much that I want to get off my chest, but it's never easy allowing yourself to fully dig inside your unconscious desires and bring them into reality without fear of the repercussions.
Anyways, I'm happy with my life. Today I went to work and I saw my coworkers again, my boss(es), along with my students and their parents. I think that was the most exciting thing I've done all day and it made me truly happy. I came home with a good feeling that I have been missed and that I touched the lives of my students and even their parents. It made me miss my job as an instructor and seeing all those kids faces smiling back at me. I'm glad I'm coming back in the summer. It was nice to know that they still asked about me and whether or not I was coming back and it was reassuring when they said I was still their favorite instructor. And to top it all off, I was speechless when I met one of the new instructors there and they introduced me as "Mr. Eric. He's the one who made all the kids cry when he left". How are you supposed to feel? Good that these kids cared so much about you and you loved them back all the same? Or sad that they missed you that much and you kind of left them "hanging"? All in all, some of my students that I've grown quite attached to don't come there anymore, but it's all okay. I still love what I did and I will never, ever forget those memories that I had. Man, I'm getting too worked up about my job.
Winter break is almost over. I go back to Berkeley within a week. I miss my school, my dorm and floormates, my Berkeley friends. But at the moment, I want my Long Beach kids to come back so we can kick it just one last time, one last time and I'll be happy.
Goodnight world.
Sincerely,
Eric Gerona Carnaje
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| | Posted 1/13/2009 12:46 AM - 27 Views - 0 eProps - 0 comments
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